Zoetry Montego Bay

Just got back from a week at Zoetry MoBay. Two of us travelled - 2 mature women living in Canada. I am Jamaican born and visit Jamaica at least once a year. My travelling partner is Canadian but has travelled to Jamaica several times. Zoetry is a lovely and beautiful hotel. It is a 5-star resort. However, there's a few things that prevent me from giving it a 5-star review. Here's a few details: Vibe: hotel is beautiful. It's very quiet. There's very little in the way of entertainment. It's a small, intimate place, for those who would like to have good meals, lounge at the pool and spend time with each other. It's not a party place or a late-night place. It's very sedate and 'adult'....though, one should know that it's not truly an adult-only hotel. We had seen it advertised on travel sites as adult-only, but know that Zoetry itself states that children are welcome, but there are no children's activities. There were children - about 4 or 5, while we were there. I wouldn't recommend that one bring children here though. They would be bored! Room: we were a double tropical-view room. We asked to be moved to a King tropical-view room, and while the front desk said that there would be no charge for such a move, others had truly booked Kings, and she couldn't understand why we would want to have a King bed. It made no sense to her. She carried on so much, we just stayed in the room, but it felt like she was insinuating that it was strange for 2 women to want a King bed. None of her business.... The room was pretty, but not like it was pictured anywhere I've seen this room pictured - no chair at all in the room. Very disappointed it was not as advertised. However, it was beautiful. Housekeeping was great. Loved the daily sparkling wine. A couple of real 'downers' with the room, however.....the sound of the drain from what I assume were other rooms' either toilet or shower draining. Loud! So loud, it would wake us up. Also, our room was over the lobby, and while the hotel is not a party place, the lobby can get loud with folks especially at the bar. Some nights we could hear every word. I'd recommend that folks try to request not staying in a room on the 2nd floor above the lobby. Food: Very good! We had some excellent meals. Beef tenderloin, shrimp and some of the fish dishes were great. Breakfast was really good. Jamaica buffet night was fantastic. I had the Jamaican breakfast almost daily - great! However, I must note that the food is not tailored to Jamaican cuisine for the most part, though they pride themselves on local produce. For example, October is prime breadfruit season - but none was ever served at the hotel. I asked a staff about this who agreed and noted that there really was not a lot of Jamaican-focussed foods or drinks such as even Ting or ginger beer. While the food quality was good, and the staff were very friendly and lovely, the service was so slow....slower that I've had anywhere. Not nearly enough servers at any meal or providing bar service. Unacceptably slow service. Beach: This was the deal-breaker of this hotel. The beach is terrible! The water is unswimmable. It is full of seaweed. You can walk to the end of the pier and climb down into deep water and swim there, but that's the only decent water here (though my travelling partner got several jellyfish stings here). If you like to walk into the water from the sand and swim, you can't come here. Any reviewer that says that the beach is OK is lying. It's so bad! We went into town a couple of times to swim at the public beach (Dead End) and the paid beach (Doctor's Cave). The hotel should have run shuttles into town so folks could swim. Tip: the front desk gave us a taxi price of $80USD to go into town to the beach. They said that this was a very good price and we would never get cheaper anywhere. I declined and we went out on the street and took a taxi for $10 each way. The beach is 10 minutes away. Staff: Lovely, lovely people. Most staff were very friendly. Some of the standouts were Melissa, Tanisha (Deneisha?), Rachelle and of course, Mr. Sunshine - he is as amazing as everyone says. Gym: A tiny room. There's a treadmill, recumbent bike and some ellipticals. They are good. However, there are also 2 spin bikes - these are unusable! They make terrible noises and are stiff. I spin religiously, so I know spin bikes. The gym is tiny. There's a few dumbells - maybe 6....so I'd advise to only use the gym for the cardio machines. There are fitness classes, but while we were there, many classes did not happen. Shopping trip: We went on the free trip offered to Shoppes at Rose Hall. We knew what to expect as we've been there before. It is a tourist trap, but all the souvenirs you could want are there as well as jewellery - and there is a Pandora store. The driver took us to a close-by souvenir shop before going to Shoppes. That shop and others in the mall are a million times cheaper than Shoppes, especially for things like coffee. In summary, though I've noted several critiques, the hotel is quite beautiful. Because it's so small and quiet, it's very relaxing. There's nothing that you can do but relax. We had a great time. If the beach was good, I'd definitely return. Read less

This place is HORRIBLE!!!!!!!!!! We arrived on October 9, 2019 . It was our 10 year anniversary. This nightmare started with the plan ride. First and formal we had no ideas that Southwest , doesn’t give you assigned seats. ( like jet blue does ) so my wife was seating in the front of the plan , and I was all the way in the back , and our carry on was in the middle of the plan. Then we arrived at the hotel , and we had no butler , no welcome greeting , or anyone to carry are luggage to the 2nd floor.( which I didn’t mind doing) but when you get told that you will get pamper and all they did was sale you a dream. It’s kinda messed up . Then we get to our room , and no one gives us a tour of the property, and a time frame of when each event takes place . We had to figure it out ourself!!!!!!! The pool services was horrible , we will order a drink and it took them 20 minutes to bring back are drinks.( when this place was completely died, no one was out there but us) the food was very AMERICAN!!!! Why will I go to Jamaica and not eat authentic Jamaincan food ?!?!?!?? The Liquor was not top shelf like promised .. they will sell you a dream , a Fantasy!! But it’s ALL A LIE!!!!!!!! I was told I can go to the other resorts that are linked to the hotel , like secrets, and breathless . Come to know that you have to pay your tax fee( which is cool with me ) and also pay to stay there . ( which is not cool) tax are super expensive ! This was just all a NIGHTMARE for my wife and I . This will be the last time JAMAICA will see of the RODRÍGUEZ FAMILY!!!!! ATTENTION!!!!!!!! Read less

Recently returned from our honeymoon at this resort. The room and the view were tremendous. Service was quite poor. For the first few days we had terrible service including having the housekeeper scold me for using towels to clean up a water leak. Service got better later in the week but was probably 50/50. I will provide an example to help illustrate. On our second day they we were eating from the Jerk Chicken place but eating at the outdoor restaurant as it was raining. We were eating with a couple we had met. During this time (greater than 1 hour) we had at least 20 different staff members walk past (one was the GM). No one offered to clear our plates and no one offered to get us drinks - not once. On this day the resort also ran out of bacon and sausage a breakfast, the lobby bar ran out of grey goose, the ran out of wings at lunch and blue cheese dressing at lunch. I tried to take the free snorkel trip but as there were not 4 people they would not take me out. I asked to use gear to swim around the lagoon and was told no. The food menu never matched what was shown on the Sundial and food choices were not great. I will say the folks at the spa were very nice and did a great job. They had music a couple nights that was very enjoyable as well. We were going to join the travel club but based on this experience declined. One final note this poor service was experienced with less than 40 total quest at the resort (on the day I asked there were 37 of us there). Read less

If you want to do nothing but relax, it's ok. But if you want a variety of well prepared meals ahd ehtertainment, it's definitely under par. One guest told us they thought the food quality was "rubbish". Dining room and bar service was extremely slow most of the time. One dinner to 2 and a half hours because of service and we were treated very rudely. Breakfast usually took at least an hour to get eggs and coffee. Same menu every day. Only one restaurant is open at a time. There was nothing to do after dinner in the evening. The pool wasn't vacuumed of sand most of the week. The beach was a huge disappointment. In the pictures it looks breathtaking. In person, you can't even swim. Jerky Joe's was the highlight of the food. Dining room service is beyond slow and most of the wait staff seems miserable. Hostess never smiled. Our room was lovely and quiet. We never got the welcome bottle of rum that was promised. Housekeeping broke an expensive perfume bottle and promised to take care of it. It caused frustration all week because we couldn't get an answer about how they were replacing it and also at check out created a difficult departure. Still no restitution. Will never return and probably not go to any Zoetry's at this point. Should have moved to Secrets. Manager was unavailable most of our visit and the UVC rep miscommunicated about 2 things and then took no responsibility. This was a special anniversary trip for us and we are VERY disappointed. Seemed that once we expressed frustration, our service and trip went downhill fast and we were treated differently. Read less